one of lcd soundsystem's roadies plays just the cowbell. i would love this position. love the cowbell, and not ashamed of it. they played a brilliant show tonight, but i felt way too old to be amongst all the jumping and pushing and shoving. i have gross guy sweat all over me and there were several people who should perhaps look into a stronger deodorant. there was absolutely no chivalry, it was a free-for-all. i did see a big guy holding the fort down and protecting his girl throughout though. so sweet.

at the bodega, i encountered a drunk girl who was sticking price tags from the pricegun onto her face and asking everyone in the store to go home with her funny drunk people are the limit.

the new whole foods is beautiful. they really did elevate it to a new level. i needn't have eaten lunch before going in since they were giving away so many samples. i went to the regular checkout line and there was no line. it is odd they have security by the door, asking to see your receipt though. since they got it together in about a month's time, i wonder why it took them 3 years to open in the first place. suck.

7

i'm going out every night this week. my tolerance is through the roof. must get it back to a more manageable (for the wallet) level.

laughing so hard is difficult to control in an office environment

well...

rules of the game:
every player starts by figuring out six intriguing/special things about themselves. the challenged blogger must write these into his/her blog AND the rules of the game. Then s/he must continue the game by challenging six other bloggers and leave a comment on their blog saying "you've been challenged!" and referring back to his/her own blog for the rules.

1. english was my second language. chinese was my first. according to my mother, one day i stopped talking and did the usual, watched a lot of sesame street and fragglerock. when i started speaking again, it was in english and i've had some kind of mental block against chinese since. meaning, i can understand perfectly but can't speak.

2. i like it when people i've just met/don't know me well, call me ev. i instinctually like these people anyway.

3. land meat does not interest me and, in many cases, repels me. but i love love love fish, especially sushi. when i get a sushi craving, i must give in. nothing else will do.

4. i enjoy solving conundrums. in fact, sometimes i think i create complications in my life just to figure out a way to make things work.

5. i love a painful massage. the more it hurts (to the point where it's hard for me to breathe), the more i love it. hurts so good.

6. i have a loud motherfucking laugh, and am proud of it.

reason #930485473902304 i hate my neighbor

6:30am. his dog is barking. it needs to go out. i know this, because the goddamn barking woke me up. the dog's bark isn't even that loud, the walls are just that woefully thin. what does neighbor do? mumble at it. yell at it. move things around noisily. right, because shuffling the table around is going to magically stop your dog from needing to pee/poop. moron.

bulgarian coworker, close the window one more time and i will cut you.

the funniest moment so far of 07

nb and i were walking on icy, slippery brooklyn sidewalk last night. we were clutching each others' arms to try to stay upright and get to our destination. oh we were also quite toasted. so i step off the sidewalk and onto the street, onto what turns out to be a sheet of ice. i went flying and landed on my back. .5 seconds later nb does the same. there we are, lying on our backs on the street, bawling with laughter. for at least 2-3 minutes straight. i laughed so hard my eyes were tearing. it was a fantastic (and i'm sure fantastic-looking) fall. it didn't hurt, and there are no bruised backsides today.

splat!

BAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

oh fun times.

my mom bought me a boobie top!

i know she had no idea what it would look like on...

ew ew ew ew ew ew EW EW EW EW EW EW EW!

my mom just kicked a huge rat the size of a small kitten on our walk back from dinner. it scuttled inches in front of me. not 2 seconds later, i tripped on another rat that ran between my feet. i saw the upcoming road lined with garbage bags and refused to walk on it. norfolk st is rat-infested!

on the plus side, our waiter was a dreamboat from sydney. swoon!

a world of no

more yummy goodness from mcdonalds.

oh dear god.

there are no words.

you really do NOT want to click that if you're eating.

is it wrong that i laughed at this?

i was sitting here at the computer when i started to hear sammy whines coming from the bedroom. it took a minute or 2 to register that this was not normal caterwauling/mewling. i went in, thinking he'd be eyeing a huge bug he wanted to eat. i saw him struggling by the air conditioner and illogically thought he might have tangled himself up in some cords. lo and behold, he'd caught a claw in a hole he'd made in my mattress (oh that clawing noise wakes me up). i had to extract his claw for him and he ran away all ashamed.

then i opened a bag of rice and it assploded everywhere :(

stop making out everywhere!

for fuck's sake. in the past couple days, i've seen boob groping, crotch grabbing, and dry humping. this is so beyond pda. CUT IT OUT! naturally, none of the people getting their shit on in public was someone i'd ever want to think sexy thoughts about.

the endless string of maladies continues

i have assorted gashes around my eye. caused by my cute, lovable cat. this morning, as usual, he was clawing at the blinds. as usual, i pulled him towards me half-asleep. seconds later, his littermaid went off and he pounced on my face. he's usually spazzy/hyper in the morning, and for some reason - even after 5 years - he MUST watch the littermaid go. every. single. time. it is endlessly fascinating to him.

i thought, shit, now i have scratches on my face. when my finger had blood on it, i jumped up and looked in the mirror. a not shallow gash resides under my eye, where i guess it'll be two weeks for it to heal, scab, etc. fantastic. i must look so hot.

ohhhhh really

excerpted from this month's issue of jane.

""show her the rule," alex says. on command, justin presses his thumbs together to form a three-sided rectangle. the girl's ass is supposed to fit inside."


and what of HIS shit?

i guess alex, justin et al are smoking hot with massive dicks.

shin splints are a bust

check out the badass wallpaper in nb's kitchen -



those polskas are so funny.

we decided to walk across the williamsburg bridge to end the night, at 5am on friday night. it was one of those great drunken ideas that was a lot of fun, but hence the shin splints.



we be leaving brooklyn.



almost into the city.



the weird doorway on rivington. i'd be much obliged if someone could tell me what this is about.



the sun rises on my street.

on saturday, i attended an older, wealthy people birthday party at a bowery loft. it caused much apartment envy in me. the lost was awesome and the kind of place i aspire to live. i don't think that will ever be a reality since they were all snapped up in the 70s-80s or are being ripped down to make way for ugly condos or hotels.



check the spread.



there were cute signs like this all over the apartment, like red wine, ice, beer, no lines in the bathroom - the line is long enough. good times.

in protest

ARTIST: Jimmy Soul
TITLE: If You Wanna Be Happy
Lyrics and Chords


{Refrain}
If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So from my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you

/ C D / Bm Em / C D / D7 G /

{Refrain}

A pretty woman makes her husband look small
And very often causes his downfall
As soon as he marries her, then she starts
Doin' the things that will break his heart

/ G - / D G / G - / D G /

But if you make an ugly woman your wife
You'll be happy for the rest of your life
An ugly woman cooks your meals on time
An she'll always give you peace of mind

{Refrain}

Don't let your friends say you have no taste
Go ahead and marry anyway
Though her face is ugly and her eyes don't match
Take it from me, she's a better catch

{Refrain}